


vacations with a hitlist

by hoasen



Series: of sweetness, strategies, and a pair of Rukongai brats [2]
Category: Bleach
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Canon What Canon, Hueco Mundo, M/M, Male-Female Friendship, Pining, Pre-Relationship, Self-Indulgent
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-25
Updated: 2020-04-25
Packaged: 2021-03-02 05:46:51
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,809
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23840083
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hoasen/pseuds/hoasen
Summary: How to get yourselves a kid as you and your sister traverse enemy territory! Featuring an Ichigo, Uryuu, and Orihime who didn't sign up for this.
Relationships: Background/Implied Kurosaki Ichigo/Urahara Kisuke, Ichimaru Gin & Matsumoto Rangiku, Ichimaru Gin & Nelliel Tu Oderschvank & Matsumoto Rangiku, Ichimaru Gin/Ishida Uryuu, Inoue Orihime & Ishida Uryuu
Series: of sweetness, strategies, and a pair of Rukongai brats [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1711264
Comments: 4
Kudos: 32





	vacations with a hitlist

**Author's Note:**

> yeah, I got really attached to this au

So. What possessed them to hightail their way up and around Hueco Mundo, they don’t know (in the same way that the author doesn’t know why they decided to write Bleach fanfic despite last seeing it years ago). Yeah, sure, Aizen might have to do something with it along with their Human World exile, but the point still stands.

The place is dark and windy with sand stretching out for eternity to end, crawling with ambient reiryouku. A moon, high, high above like an unreachable treasure, the only light before their eyes in a clear obsidian sky the color of Uryuu’s eyes, as Gin had said.

It’ll be years before they’ll stop finding sand in their possessions. Gin and Rangiku truly have no idea what they’re doing, to put this is the gentlest of terms. Clearly, their Big Master Plan has everything outlined down to what color combination they’ll be wearing when they descend on Aizen’s fortress of arrancar soldiers (the nasty bunch they are). There’s a huge gap on what to do before that though, they’ve already gotten into Las Noches without a  _ huge  _ scuffle and took names of some lower arrancars. 

Ah yes. It’s coming back now, the gathering information part for Shady Shop Owner Man to over-analyze then to continue plotting back in the Human World part. She misses the sweets he the shopkeeper couldn’t send over with the passion of burning suns but alas, dealing with megalomaniacs takes precedent.

“ _ Ran-chan _ ,” Gin’s whines come out distorted under the fake Hollow mask.”But the plum wine!”

Yes, The Plum Wine. The only bottle remaining in their stash before they’re left with bad coffee and plain water. They’re already down to instant ramen (not even the good kind) and that  _ will  _ last another month before they'll have to resort to tasteless ration bars.

Her feet deftly avoids a ditch in the sand “You said we’re saving that for  _ after _ we at least finish off the Privaron Espada,” and everything below, but the temptation isn’t being helped by Gin’s comments at all. 

If she doesn’t come out of this as anything less than a fucking saint then nothing is real.

How they managed to go through a year’s worth of food under half the time she never wants to know. Perhaps it’s their penchant to enlighten stray sentient Hollows of the joy that is consuming something not a soul or the fact that the food was  _ really  _ good. 

(According to word of mouth, there’s now a black market, as much as markets could even exist, for human food in Hueco Mundo.)

She twitches ever so slightly for her hidden zanpaktou when a turquoise vanishes right past her, into and out of view. A Hollow no doubt, but one she has no reason to expose her identity to when it doesn’t seem to notice her. Gin shares a long look with her, thinking within the same lines.

Gin brings a finger to his lips when it looks like she was beginning to form a sentence, then points to the direction where the Hollow ran off. There are no footsteps but instead a faint trail of reiatsu. His eyes are shaped in that particular curve that says he’s going to attempt something reckless and Rangiku’s going to have  _ fun  _ watching. That is before she gets dragged into it herself but! Positivity!

They follow the trail at a cautious speed until the Hollow’s reiatsu signature points to a little girl with turquoise hair, and on top of her head like a crown, lays a broken Hollow mask. An arrancar.

An arrancar who is hiding from  _ something  _ and it reeks of Aizen’s doing. Their thoughts are confirmed when three adjuchas, roughly the size of towers. Shinsou is going to have a good time.

“Oh, should we?” Rangiku traces the handle of her hidden zanpaktou, face considering.

This also reads as: ‘ _ I  _ swear _ , if this ends up a mess, I know nothing of an Ichimaru _ ’.

He nods. Gin isn’t the type to rush into confrontations though, not like Zaraki or Kurosaki. So there must be a greater purpose to this. With a sigh, she relents and draws Haineko. This kid better is thankful.

-

_ And  _ that’s the story of how they got themselves an arrancar child, even if said child was in no real danger in the first place.

“I,” a deep breath, “Can’t believe you Gin.”

If Orihime was here, she’ll sympathize.

“Ain’t she just like us!” he grins in that shitty grin meaning he’s not going to shut up until the decade’s over.

No. “If we had a child Gin, then  _ obviously  _ she’ll take after the prettier one,” Rangiku motions to herself. “But I think someone else would want a child with you first, anyhow.”

That quickly gets him to turn back his attention to the young girl, who’s looking at them with wide hazel eyes. Short turquoise hair and power just humming beneath her skin, she’s holding the last piece of candy in their possession. Her friends (former fraccion), curled around her like a promise.

The kid bounces on the sand, “Shinigami are  _ bad _ ! But Nel’s sure you’re good people!”

(He almost feels offended that Aizen's their representative.)

There’s actual sunshine coming off of her, Rangiku isn’t blind and has to stop herself from cooing at the girl. On second thought Hueco Mundo wouldn’t be that bad if every Hollow was cute as this, even if the reiatsu Nel gives off is comparable to a seated officer and that’s assuming she doesn’t have it repressed.

“I’m Ichimaru Gin and the hag’s my sister, Matsumoto Rangiku,” he ignores the irate eye roll that earns him. “Nice ta meet ‘cha.”

“Nelliel Tu Odelschwanck!” She has a slight lisp, and that’s  _ not  _ a name of an ordinary Hollow.

“We’re here to get rid of your Shinigami problem,” Rangiku slides her zanpaktou back to its hiding place, shifting the fake Hollow mask and pulling on her Aizen approved white cloak they lifted last time near his headquarters.

-

Las Noches feels almost like home in contrast to the barren desert lands. Kind of like Shady Shop Owner Man’s science basement they vowed to never go down again in a way.

(It gets worse when they meet pink hair with glasses and brother issues.)

Nel leads them to the least monitored entrance she knows of (and she knows a lot), weaving through dimly lit hallways upon hallways (because Aizen never had a sense of style, to begin with). This… it’s a lot easier than Rangiku had expected.

Famous last words.

-

In Karakura High, during the prelude to finals season, Ichigo’s bullshit meter was tingling. He can feel it in the air. This isn’t Ishida’s regular moping hours with clothes or Orihime bringing out her research questions. No—this is the bullshit meter’s way of saying ‘Shinigami shit’s going down nearby’, which is a  _ lot  _ better than Quincy shit last year but the point stands.

When he looks up from his homework to see Rukia, five feet in the air, looking down at him, it makes sense.

“Aren’t you  _ employed _ ?” Ichigo lets out a long-suffering sigh, then goes straight back to the Calculus. It’s way too early in the morning for this.

She plops down next to him, “Oh it’s not like they’ll care.”  _ Ah _ , then she’s here without permission. Splendid. “But I think your friends would want to know that a Garganta opened around here recently and two of our people disappeared because of it.”

The sinking feeling is back, stronger than ever. Who were they, _ who were they _ ? Is it Renji or Hanataro, Hitsugaya, or Byakuya?

“Though,” she tilts her head as if she understood his thoughts, “They wouldn’t be considered ours anymore. Former Captain of the Third Division and former Lieutenant of the Tenth, the Second lost track of them half a year ago.”

A low growl he didn’t know he could make falls through his lips, “What?”

Hueco Mundo— _ Aizen _ . Ichigo was never close with the two ex-Shinigami, not in the way Ishida and Orihime are, they were tentative allies at best, friends by association who look at him as if he were an interesting gamble. Still, they’ve fought alongside him, for him to a certain extent, they’re  _ his  _ now.  _ His  _ in the way Rukia, his sisters, his friends, the Visored, Yoruichi, and  _ Kisuke  _ are.

His people.

Losing any one of them, he refuses. 

The Geta-Boushi must already know about this because there is almost nothing that Kisuke would not know, but he doubts Orihime or Uryuu do.  _ Fuck _ , he’s well aware of how powerful Ichimaru and Matsumoto are but this is Aizen’s territory they’re walking into.

Gathering his breath, he thanks Rukia, then whisking away to Urahara Shoten and  _ this  _ time, he’ll get his answers, even if he has to throttle it out. Ichigo is strong enough for it, these past years have not been passing by in idle.

“Hey, Rukia!” he shouts before she could vanish away completely, “Can you gather the group!”

She knows what he means when she gives him a resolute nod with a joking salute, then turning towards Chad's apartment first.

-

“You can’t,” Kisuke says flatly.

Ichigo can’t lose his temper here, not when there are lives at stake, “Then tell me why.”

He’s always been a spitfire dipped in steel, the first to react and last stand down. It’s helped him through the years, proved him through blade and grit. Not here though, this is too delicate.

It takes two moments and a heartbeat before Kisuke finally presents an answer, in a low unshaking voice, pleading too, in a way. Everyone who has met the group of wayward Shinigami knows of the plans beneath plans within the sleeves of their robes, tightly woven despite what surface-level appearances they present may say. Ichigo is, perhaps, the one most intimately familiar with this, being the cog Urahara shapes himself.

“They won’t die,” is the only reassurance offered. “But you can’t get involved, Ichigo, this is not your time to.”

Oh, Ichigo is also very aware of what his ‘part’ in Kisuke’s master plan was to send Aizen down depths where no being could hope to even breathe, or how it was in all essence, the purpose of him existing. Born and bred to do so. Die too, if he had not known, because ripping apart your soul is a fate worse than being vanquished whole.

“And leave them without any backups, failsafe?”

“They plan to finish off Aizen themselves,” Kisuke runs his hands through the fine blond hair

The only ones who know of this plan, who've played a part in it to a certain extent, he now realizes, without ever pushing him to the Final Getsuga had been Ichimaru and Matsumoto. Maybe they don’t know it, but there’s no looming expectation of the limitless power Ichigo  _ should _ have. They look at him and they see Ishida’s friend or Urahara’s experiment and that’s a hell of a lot better than a weapon. All due to a single reason.

‘ _ They plan to finish off Aizen themselves _ .’

It must have ticked Kisuke off to an unbearable degree when things don’t go according to plan. Ichigo likes it in a way, how the man is so awfully close those barriers are to coming down when Kisuke’s like this, stripped of all pretenses. This was the only time that line separating them became blurred and muddled under his feet.

“I am not where I was three years ago and you know that, Geta-Boushi,” not that words ever succeeded in stopping him. The ability to open Garganta conveniently comes with having a Hollow inside you after all.

“I  _ can’t  _ let you die,” there’s an edge of desperation to the man’s voice, “Just wait—the completed maps and reports of Hueco Mundo should come in soon.”

That’s a compromise if they’ll ever reach one.

-

He’s camping out in Orihime’s apartment for a few days until Ryuuken decides that making an effort to stay at home is a useless endeavor. Uryuu has enough assignments to file through as it is, almost three mountain’s worth before the scholarship requirements were upped. There’s a companionship to be felt when it’s four in the morning and you and your studying buddies are Out Of Coffee  _ again _ .

His pen, a cheap ballpoint from the convenience store that’s supposed to last forever, is nearly out of ink and that’s a sign if anything. This afternoon, if Ryuuken isn’t waiting in the living room, he will  _ borrow _ something out of the man’s office. Heavy eyelids aside, today is going to be a productive one, he can feel it in the air.

“So! I just got a call from Ichigo-kun!” Orihime flops onto the nearest pile of pillows scattered throughout the floor after chucking her spiritually enhanced phone to where the rest of her books are. “He’s got news about them.”

Ah yes,  _ them _ . The single-handedly worst and best thing that happened in Uryuu and Orihime’s short life. He doesn’t know all that well what goes on between Orihime and Matsumoto but Uryuu’s well aware of his ludicrous infatuation with the silver-haired Shinigami, who brings every inch of him wanting to recite poetry for, with all the theatrics involved, like a fool.

It’s irrationality to the fullest, he’s ranted about so too many times. Still, Gin’s departure those three years ago had  _ hurt _ . Three years ago, the man had collapsed right into Uryuu’s arms the moment the battle had ceased. All he could think about at that time had been how well Gin had fit in his embrace. Like pieces of patchworks from different puzzles fitting like they’re made to be so.

Uryuu had felt his breath catch then, no poet, no painting could capture the rising feeling of  _ mine _ ,  _ mine _ ,  _ mine  _ that wraps him whole gazing upon Gin’s face so at peace, so  _ vulnerable _ .

It was a mistake he had let go then, let Gin be taken back by the Soul Society. No one he loved has returned once Seireitei chained them away, it was never going to start then. Banished,  _ exiled _ , gone without a word.

(There's a letter on his nightstand he refuses to look at, hidden in between novels and paintings. His name is written on there, with a flowing script in deep black ink that could never replace the man's voice.)

“Must be important for him to contact you at this ungodly hour,” Uryuu mutters from under his breath, dropping the pen. He looks at her expectantly.

This wouldn’t be the first time they’ve done something utterly inane. That's what keeps their friendship strong.

Orihime doesn’t miss a beat, “They’re in Hueco Mundo.”

Ah, Matsumoto has never mentioned this before, but it explains the lack of letters these past months and even the ones that look like they’ve been written beforehand. It's a good thing that the two of them have everything packed and ready to go.

From the window, a knock pulls them from their thoughts. It's Rukia with Chad in tow and breakfast because Chad is a miracle in the kitchen and they wouldn't be alive without him.

"Was there a party we didn't know about?" Rukia grins slightly, surveying the stacks of ignored textbooks.

-

_ And  _ that’s the story of how four teenagers (without a cat this time but an unseated officer) began their journey through Hueco Mundo. Coincidentally, this is right around the time Gin and Rangiku decide to book it to the Menos Forest before leaving.

"Ran-chan," Gin steps over the previously alive Septima Espada as Rangiku finishes the last of the three's fraccion members. They've got more done than expected. "Ya think this is good enough?"

No, but, she kicks a heavy scythe from a Quinto Espada away, "This would be for now."

They've got a solid of two-fifths of Aizen's strongest, and more for the Numeros. It helps, of course, when the Octava's loyalty was that of paper in water. Nel's happily perched on Gin's shoulder, cheery with the promise of pastries awaiting once they leave.

"Are we gonna visit Uryuu-kun?" she's been listening in too much on Rangiku.

"His boyfriend," yes, she's well aware of the situation between them. No, they haven't gotten a letter from him yet. "Will be happy to see him and you too, sweetie."

That's their kid now, and hell would they leave her and her friends behind in this hellhole. The Human World would be happy to have them back after so long. This is Shady Shop Owner Man's business now, their part is over once the report arrives at Urahara's door.

-

Somewhere in the far distance, approximately about half a month later, Ichigo and Co. land right where a Starrk and Lilynette were doing their best to play this new card game that recently hit the Las Noches black market. It's fun, something about fish and gold.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading and yell at me on twitter at [@hoalianyas](https://twitter.com/hoalianyas?s=09) !


End file.
